How to Rediscover Yourself Outside of Teaching: The piano keyboard metaphor

This post is the second of a three-part series for teachers wondering who they are beyond the classroom. Continue reading: Teacher Identity Crisis: Who am I without teaching? and How to Explore NEW Identities Outside Teaching

Picture yourself sitting at a piano.

You're playing the same song. The same section of keys. The same octaves. The same familiar notes and melodies you've been playing for years.

You've gotten really good at these notes. You know exactly what to expect when your fingers hit those keys. People recognize your sound. You're comfortable here.

But you've been playing this one section of notes for so long, that over time you've stopped noticing the rest of the keyboard.

The high notes. The low notes. The full range of music you could be making—it's all still there, right in front of you.

You've just forgotten it exists.

This is what happens with identity.

When one identity (like "teacher") takes up so much space in your life, you forget about all the other parts of yourself. Not just the parts you're expressing now, but the parts you used to express that have gone quiet over time.

You start to believe that the few keys you know are all you're capable of playing. But it's not true!

You're no one-octave pianist! You never were.

Let me show you what I mean.

The Keys (identities) you're playing right now

Right now, you're playing familiar notes as a teacher—the Helper, the Organizer, the Explainer, the Community Builder, the Problem-Solver. (see _____blog for other teacher micro-identities) You know these keys inside and out.

You're also playing other familiar keys: parent, partner, writer, reader, activist, animal lover.

These identities are active in your life. They're comfortable. You're playing them regularly.

And there's nothing wrong with them.

But when these are the ONLY keys you play, something starts to happen:

You forget there's more music available to you.

You play the same melodies over and over. And at some point, you start to wonder: "Why do I feel stuck? Why does something feel missing?"

The answer might not be that you need to leave teaching or change everything about your life.

The answer might be that you've stopped playing keys that used to ring out loud and clear.

The Keys (Identities) that have gone quiet

Take a moment and think back.

Who were you before teaching took over so much of your time and energy?

What did you used to do, create, or express that you don't anymore?

These are your dormant identities—the keys that used to be central to who you are but have collected dust over the years.

Maybe you used to be:

An artist who painted, drew, made pottery, or created things with your hands

An athlete who trained regularly, competed, or just moved your body in ways that felt powerful and alive

A musician who played an instrument, sang, or made music part of your daily life

A writer who journaled, wrote poetry, drafted stories, or had a blog

An entrepreneur who had side projects, built things, sold your creations, or dreamed of running your own business

A community organizer who brought people together around causes you cared about

A performer who acted, danced, or expressed yourself on stage

An adventurer who traveled, explored new places, took risks

A board gamer who brought people together around a table to play

A language learner who communicated across cultures

A maker or DIY-er who built, fixed, renovated, or crafted things

A devoted member of a faith community, cultural group, or social circle that was central to your identity

A leader in spaces outside your job—running clubs, organizing events, mentoring others informally

Life got busy. Teaching consumed more hours than you expected. Grad school happened. Kids arrived. Caregiving responsibilities grew. Time disappeared.

And slowly, without you really noticing, these identities faded into the background.

You might tell yourself: "I'm just not that person anymore." Or "I don't have time for that." Or "That was a different phase of my life."

But here's what I want you to consider:

Those identities didn't disappear. They're just dormant.

The keys are still there. They still work. You just haven't played them in a while.

And sometimes—often, actually—the keys that have gone quiet are exactly the ones you need to play again to figure out why you feel stuck or what's missing in your career and your life.

Consider my own experience of re-discovering a few dormant identities. I wrote a post about it in my personal blog titled: Portals to Past Identities.

Which identities have you let go?

What identities have gone quiet in your life? Not just what hobbies did you used to have" (though that's part of it).

What ways of BEING in the world did you used to express that you don't anymore?

Were you an artist? An athlete? A builder? A performer? A writer? An entrepreneur? A community leader? An adventurer?

What would it feel like to play those keys again?

Not perfectly. Not at the level you used to. Just... at all.

What if you picked ONE dormant identity and gave it 30 minutes this week?

One identity that used to be part of you that you miss, even a little bit.

What if you:

• Took a beginner painting class (even though you used to be "good" and now you're rusty)

• Went for a run (even if it's slow and short)

• Wrote in a journal (even if it feels awkward at first)

• Started tinkering with a side project idea (even if you have no idea where it will go)

• Played your instrument for 15 minutes (even if your fingers don't remember)

• Joined a community group you used to be part of (even if it feels scary to return)

You might discover: "Oh, I don't actually miss this. I've moved on."

That's useful information.

Or you might discover: "Wait. I forgot how much I LOVE this. I need this in my life."

That's also useful information.

Either way, you're gathering data about yourself that you can't get any other way.

This isn't about adding more to your plate

You might be thinking: "I barely have time to breathe. How am I supposed to add a whole identity to my life?"

You don't need to resurrect every dormant identity at once. You don't need to overhaul your life. It's more about just remembering who you are beyond your job.

And sometimes, when you give a dormant identity even a tiny bit of space, it can open up huge windows of clarity and possibility.

When you reconnect with parts of yourself that have been starving for attention, you often find:

• You have more energy (because you're feeding your soul, not just grinding through)

• You have more clarity about what you need/want (because you can see what's actually missing)

• You have more patience (because you're not asking teaching to meet ALL your needs)

Dormant identities aren't distractions. They're often the missing pieces in life or career changes that feel good.

The keys are still there. It's time to play them again!

Ready to answer the question: "Who would I be without teaching?"

Get the free Teacher Identity Guide — three blog posts, an Identity Constellation Worksheet, and a week of guided emails to walk you through mapping your full identity and generating career possibilities grounded in who you actually are.

I'm Laura, a coach for teachers exploring a career change

I help teachers at a career crossroads figure out what’s next, especially if you have no idea if you actually want to leave teaching, or what that next move could be!

I offer 1:1 coaching, a group program, & an online course